I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I love you. Go after that dick
So. Much. Porn.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
