his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid