People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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