ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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