I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
