Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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