I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
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I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
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Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs