He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
