I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
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