there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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