At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
