she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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