My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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