I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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