are you still at the devil's house?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize