One girl and one boy is just not enough.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
