it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
