I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
