Me too!
They should really pass out barf bags in church
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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