Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
