Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.