He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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