i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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