I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize