They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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