i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
