I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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