I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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