i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
