he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
