Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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