happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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