holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
