He had one of those small greek statue penises
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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