Christians are straight up FREAKS
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
