Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Randomize