I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize