i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I think people are normalizing furries
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
