are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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