I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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