I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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