she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
