There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I could make wine with my vomit
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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