talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
