Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
