All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
