i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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