I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize