well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
