sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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